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How to be more secure with yourself is a question most of us have asked at least once in the past. Learning to be confident is a skill that needs to be practiced and learned. It’s not usually something that we are born with, but it is something we all deserve to experience!
Just like anything else being confident is a learned skill that comes with time and most importantly practice! You may see girls online that seem to have it all, but let me tell you, none of us are consistently confident ALL the time.
Whether it be in looks, public speaking, or not feeling like you are knowledgeable enough on a certain topic, lack of confidence comes in different variations.
Becoming confident involves A TON of internal work, and really comes down to how much trust and belief you have within yourself. If you continuously work on yourself and continue to grow, then confidence will start to become easier since you are actively working on becoming the best version of you.
On the contrary, if you continue telling yourself you will change for the better and then don’t ACTUALLY do anything about it, you will start to lose that trust. This will cause you to stop believing in yourself and your confidence will plummet.
With that being said, here are the best tips for how to be more secure with yourself. Doing so will exponentially grow your confidence through the roof!!!!
This Post Is All About How To Be More Secure With Yourself
Here's How To Become 100% Confident With Yourself
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Find Something You Can Control And Work On It
Do you go through periods when life is moving way too quickly, and you feel like you are just barely keeping up. In time’s like this I often find that my confidence goes out the window, I eat poorly, sleep poorly and ultimately end up feeling super low. Relatable???
In time’s like this try to find at least one thing that you can control. Whether it be working out, eating clean foods, learning a new skill, or just sitting down for a few minutes a day and meditating.
Whatever it is, make sure to do it consistently and focus on bettering that part of you. Often having just one thing to focus your attention on will help you gain control of other aspects of your life as well. This will ultimately make it easier to feel more confident all around.
Stop Lying To Yourself!
How many times have you told yourself that you will start on something only to forget about it a week later? This was me for years, especially with healthy eating!! It’s so important to put an end to this behavior because you are just promising yourself something you have no intention of actually seeing though.
This causes you to lose so much trust in yourself. And is one of the main reasons you may have lost confidence and security with yourself.
Every time you set out to do something and end up forgetting about it, may not feel like a lie, but it is. Over time your brain will stop trusting itself, and things will become harder and harder to stick to.
Understanding this concept and making active changes to stop it will go far in boosting your overall image of yourself. Start small, make small promises that you know you can keep, and build them up over time. Keeping promises to yourself and being honest about them will go super far in being more secure with yourself.
Analyze Your Negative Thoughts And Reframe Them Into Positive
Start paying attention to the way you speak about yourself. Having critical thoughts is normal, and not a bad thing. But there is a lot of value in addressing the thoughts you are having and getting to the root of where they come from.
If you lack confidence and don’t feel secure with yourself, you are most likely having a lot of negative thoughts about yourself. Take the time to think about them, and ask yourself why you think this way. What is the root cause of these thoughts?
When you take the time to address them, you may start to learn a lot about yourself and the origins of your thought patterns. Once you are aware of your thought patterns you can start to address them and change them for the better.
Journaling is also a great way to get to know yourself and unpack some of the thought patterns you are experiencing. Doing this will start to change your mindset for the better so that you can start to feel more confident and secure with yourself.
Here are a couple of my favorite journals I have used, but choose whichever makes you feel happiest and most excited to write in it. Because that really makes a difference 😊!
Always Be Open To Learning
A great method for how to be more secure with yourself is to start listening and watching content that will help you grow into the person you want to become.
There are a million amazing books and podcasts out there that will help you transform your mindset and start becoming the best version of yourself. Even if consuming this content doesn’t drastically change your mindset right away, it plants seeds of inspiration in your mind. Over time you will start to shift your identity and start to feel more secure with yourself.
YouTube is a great resource for shifting your mindset. I put together a list of some of my favorite videos and channels to watch to change your mindset. Check them out!
Check out these books too if you want to make real changes in your life! These are TRULY transformational, and I keep going back to them over and over throughout the years.
Buy Clothes That Fit Well
Most of the time, especially as women our confidence comes from the way we look. It’s an unfortunate part of the society we live in. That being said, finding clothes that you feel comfortable in can do wonders for your confidence!
For years after I gained weight I would still try to fit into the same clothes that I had from 5+ years ago. I would always feel so stressed out whenever I had to find anything to wear. I never felt good, and that was so detrimental to my confidence!
If you are feeling the same way, spend some time going shopping and finding pieces that fit you well and make you feel amazing! Look for basic pieces that you can style with many different looks.
Speak Up!
Your confidence and the way you feel about yourself can affect the way you are in social situations. Start paying attention to the way you speak to people and the way you speak about yourself as well. When you feel insecure or lack confidence speaking to others can be challenging.
That’s why a huge step in the process of feeling more secure with yourself is finding confidence around other people. Work on approaching social situations more confidently. Practice asking people questions, be direct and carry yourself with authority.
Start slow and build up your social skills with time. It can take a lot of practice, and even then it can still feel daunting occasionally. But so much of our self-confidence comes from the way others see us, so if you are able to be more confident around other people it will drastically start to improve your security within yourself.
Find The Source Of Where Your Current Self Worth Comes From
By figuring out where your self-confidence comes from, you can start to work on improving it even further. Find out what about yourself makes you feel confident, and what doesn’t make you feel confident, and use them both to your advantage.
By knowing your strengths and weaknesses you can pinpoint exactly what you need to still work on, and what you already feel good about. Start with figuring out the good things and use them to further boost your confidence.
Dwelling on your insecurities isn’t healthy or good for your mental health. By finding your strengths you will be able to use them to your advantage and is the key for how to be more secure with yourself.
Get Comfortable With Failure
A lot of insecurity comes from being unable to deal with failure. Whether you have failed a school exam, or failed a diet one too many times, you will start to feel less secure in that area of your life.
Failure is unavoidable though. Every single person has failed at something, self security is just about picking yourself back up and understanding that it’s all part of the learning process.
Always be willing to pick yourself back up and try again. The more you are able to practice, the more secure you will be in that area of your life. Failure is just a part of learning and should be reframed into a good thing. Accept it as an inevitable part of your life and embrace it, it will take a huge load off of you and instantly make you feel more secure with yourself.
Remember That We All Have Negative Periods, And Thats Alright!
The most important takeaway is to remember that absolutely no one is 100% confident all of the time. And even then, everyone has days when they are more confident than others. And you will too.
Figuring out how to be more secure with yourself will feel easier on some days than it does on others. Don’t be hard on yourself for it. Embrace the days when you feel confident. And on days that you lack confidence just remind yourself that they will pass.
Life is short and the older you get the more secure you will start to feel with yourself. So have fun in life, be kind, and don’t judge yourself or others too harshly!